Splat funnies

Norfolk Section
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1951 Suffolk looks like a nice boy!    1979 A Coy Win The Gaza Cup   1982 Brandy Sour and Maj TA Nightingale TD   Eurospeak   GCSE Questions and Answers   George R Osborne and his new wife   Hair of the dog, anyone?   One of the few officers who could read and write
EUROSPEAK
It is rumoured that French MEPs have petitioned the Brussels Parliament to forbid all British citizens from using the phrase “spending a penny” as soon as we have joined the single European currency.
From then on the correct terminology will be “Euronating “.
Peter Woodruff, The Rotary Club of Saxmundham and District

See Taking the Pee! in B&C 97 Dec 01.
B&C 99
HAIR OF THE DOG, ANYONE?
In the 1920s, an elderly Colonel, as crusty as his favourite port, despised the vogue for pre-dinner cocktails that were all the rage.
While there was only one acceptable pre-dinner drink - sherry - he did offer his guests his own cocktail.
It comprised a dash of brandy, a slurp of grenadine and a generous tot of his own secret, blue, ingredient.
The concoction, naturally, was shaken, not stirred, and served chilled.
No one ever requested a second and the next time they came for dinner a sherry was preferred.
The secret blue ingredient was methylated spirits!

This reminds the B&C Webmaster of the favourite tipple (more of a flagon actually!) of the Late Great Maj Trevor Nightingale TD JP, the first OC HQ Coy of 6 RANGLIAN (V) in 1981 - brandy sour. Trevor's initials were, most appropriately, 'TA'!
Later, unexpectedly, the webmaster had assumed the mantle, if not the black cloak, of Trevor.
At the conclusion of the Wed evening Drill Night training one hot June in 1982 in Bury St Edmunds, two, three or maybe even four of those delicious drinks had been downed when the Mess Steward quietly said: 'Your do realise, Sir, that those were all doubles?'
'No, thank you, I hadn't. But never mind. My wife is here and will safely drive me home.'
Ten years later, Janine and I found ourselves in Singapore on an overnight stop-over. Arriving at nearly midnight it was as hot as it had been in Bury St Edmunds so there was only one drink worth having (Adnams not being on tap).
A large Brandy Sour drunk to the Late Trevor! (Or was it 3?)
B&C 99

George R Osborne in Dec 01GEORGE R OSBORNE
We congratulate George, despite the Norfolk Editor writing him off as deceased in B&C 96 Jun 01, on his marriage to Josephine in Sep 2002.

Asked his age, George replied: ‘85 - and Josephine is 92!’

Josephine somewhat disagreed!

George served with the 1st and 2nd Bns 1940-46. Right, in Dec 2001.
B&C 99

GCSE QUESTIONS
Brian Cooper, a former School Principal in Canada, sent a compilation of student GCSE (General Certificate of Secondary Education) exam answers. More will follow but here are two questions.

  1. Summarise the achievements of Bach.

  2. Summarise the achievements of Beethoven.

Click here for the answers.
B&C 99
GCSE ANSWERS

  1. Summarise the achievements of Bach: Johann Bach wrote a great many musical compositions and had a large number of children. In between he practised on an old spinster which he kept up in his attic. Bach died from 1750 to the present. Bach was the most famous composer in the world and so was Handel. Handel was half German, half Italian and half English. He was very large.

  1. Summarise the achievements of Beethoven: Beethoven wrote music even though he was deaf. He was so deaf he wrote loud music. He took long walks in the forest even when everyone was calling for him. Beethoven expired in 1827 and later died for this.

B&C 99

Editorial Rule
 To qualify for inclusion in the B&C there is only one rule - something described must have been said to have happened. 
The authority is the Editor, British Army Review No 114 Dec 96, `If the facts don`t fit the legend, print the legend’.

However, the rules of good taste, respect and confidentiality are always applied.

Rule Britannia!

Site edited and maintained by Major JL Raybould TD
Editor, Norfolk Section, The Britannia and Castle
 B&C Norfolk Editor